There’s a white gold band on my ring finger. It’s been there a little over a week now. The day after 
Thanksgiving I got married. I’m as shocked as anybody.
When my previous marriage ended a few years ago, I was certain I would die a lonely man. Having found love once in my life, I knew it was not an easy thing to come across. Sometimes it seems the universe has things in store for us we cannot imagine.
It’s been almost three years since I signed up for a match.com account. Yeah, I did the online dating thing. I was ready to get out there and just meet some new people and basically learn how to date again. I had been married for many years prior to my divorce, so my skills in the dating realm were wanting.
For a few weeks I worked on my match profile and scanned those of women whose photos and bios seemed interesting. I sent out a few messages to some women indicating I might be interested in meeting them. Those requests went unanswered. I got messages from women wanting to meet me. None of them interested me. Some were from cougars and when you’re my age, that means the cougar is in her 60’s. Nothing against 60 year olds, but I wanted to date around my own age, some ten years younger.
I finally agreed to go out with one woman. To say she misrepresented herself was an understatement. She looked nothing like the photos she had posted online. And she dwarfed me. That’s saying something since I’m six feet tall and top 200 pounds. I had to text a friend to give me a bogus emergency call from work to bolt out of that date. It was sad and desperate, but remember I was way out of dating practice.
A short time later I got a message back from a woman who I had expressed an online interest in. She was the outdoorsy type. She posted about her mountain biking addiction and her love of nature and animals. She had talked about her work ethic and morals and what she expected from somebody she would date. And she was beautiful. So I had mustered up the courage to send her a clever message and hoped for the best. She said she would go out with me.
We met up at a restaurant and she was even prettier in person. I was a nervous wreck. My hands were sweaty and clammy and I was sure this woman was way out of my league. However, she quickly made me feel at ease. There was something about her that helped me relax. She turned out to be smart and funny and somebody I wanted to get to know more. Her name was Veronica and I had no idea at the time that I had met my bride to be.
We went out again a few days later. And then we went out again. It was on our third date that she informed me that she was planning to move back home to Chicago in a few months. I was discouraged, but determined. She gave me the option to keep dating or to move on. I said let’s see where this goes and I did the math in my head as to how many dates I might have to convince her to stay in Dallas. It took about two weeks. She said she was going to stay because she was really interested in me.
Over the next few months we spent a lot of time together. We just wanted to be together as much as possible. We talked for hours. We really got to know each other. I was falling in love. She took more convincing.
We had a few ups and downs, but not many. Our arguments can still be counted on one hand. We still love spending every waking hour together.
Last Valentine’s Day I proposed. She accepted. And now we’ve tied the knot. I’m amazed. I didn’t start dating to find a new life partner, but that’s how it turned out. You can chase love all you want, but in the end it has to find you. And it has. And I’m incredibly thankful for that.
That’s what I’m thinking.
Rick Hadley
